2011: A Year Through The Looking Glass

`But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
`Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.'
`How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
`You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'

What a strange adventure it is, to live amongst mad people. Mad people insist that their madness is sensibly normal; while to eschew normalcy, and live with true sensibility, is thought the height of madness.

The use of reason, it seems, is not enough to overcome madness.

Even I have reasoned reasons to be mad. I'm sure I still do. Its not terribly hard. Reasonable creatures reason out all sorts of reasons to be mad, stay mad, drive others to madness. Madness enjoys nothing better than company.

Maybe Fear. Madness enjoys Fear quite a lot, too. They encourage each other, like cliff-jumping teenagers.

Madness and Fear; Fear and Madness. What a pair. Drop your guard for a second and they'll have you bent over a dumpster in a dark alley.

2011 was a year of Madness and Fear. I was immersed in their putrid marinade, sauced and tossed and broiled. Surrounded by Mad people living Mad lives, demanding Mad things.

Trapped in this Mad embrace I lost direction, and the connections with myself that I had so carefully cultivated.

I was full of Fear at who I had been, Mad with old desires. Fear of decision, Mad with inaction. Fear of prejudice, Mad with judgments.

Afraid to believe in myself. Afraid to seek myself.

Mad not to.

So I did. I took a break from Madness and went seeking.

And, wouldn't you know it? I found a cure for Fear and Madness. It goes like this:

Start with a big jug of Love and a good helping of Truth, mixed well in a large bowl. Add a handful of discipline, stirring slowly, and a pinch of Faith. Throw in a few spoonfuls of Creativity for texture with some Humor and Gaiety for color.

Whip this concoction until it stands on end, then serve with a slice of humble pie.

Enjoy this deliciousness that is your True, Loving self as often as possible until Fear and Madness melt away. Use it as preventative medicine. Snack on it. Have it for every fucking meal.

Fill Yourself with It and go forth and live It. Fear can't touch It, Madness can't touch It, Others can't touch It.

Its all you, all the way down. As it was with me.

And now... Foxx is happily stepping back through that lens of Madness into a world of bright Transformation. I'm dedicated to improving myself and stoked to work with beautiful, inspirational people as we create the world that we perceive.

Thanks to all of you who loved me in spite of myself, who reminded me of the faith others had in me and who put up with my Madness. I love you beyond all measure and I promise to live up to the potential you see in me- it is the only way to properly honor all that you have gifted me with.

2012 will be a year to remember! Are you ready to Create with me?

-狐-

I think I'm Learning Japanese, I really think so!

AJATT Update!

Here I am- midway through my first week of immersion! I feel a bit like I'm in the foothills of the mountains... But compared to my disastrous attempt to learn Japanese in college this to infinity and beyond- I've learned more in a week than I did in entire semester of "this is really hard, make sure you're committed" intensive Japanese instruction.


Here is my progress so far.

1. Create immersive environment- 6/10 I've taken down all my posters (even Casablanca!). I got rid of my exit sign... if anyone can get a hold of one in Japanese, I'd be super stoked! I've stocked up on anime and got the word out on Japanese dubs (saving my pennies!). I'm going to use the method proposed on one of the AJATT comments to label everything in my apartment with post-its bearing the kanji/kana for that object. Apparently there is a new coffee shop in town ran by a Japanese-speaking couple (he's Western, but fluent, she is Japanese) so I'll stop by there tomorrow and also check out the Japanese market here in town!

Step 1 Challenge: Get rid of my books! Replace with Japanese. Same with DVD collection. Switch over computer OS to Linux Mint Japanese. Stop reading the net in English.

2. Learn the Kana: 3/10 I'm already very comfortable with the hiragana (2 days baby!), and I'm making inroads on the katakana.

Step 2 Challenge:Keep practicing hiragana, brush up on how to apply phonetic modifiers. Learn katakana by next week.

3. Learn Kanji: 0.5/2042. I've got my hands on copies of "Remembering The Kanji" I, II and III. KANJI. I thought the Kanji would be really daunting, but after reading the Heisig introduction and thinking about it a little, I don't think I'll have a huge problem- more on that later.

P.S. James Heisig is a genius. Like Mr. Khatzumoto. And, shockingly, bloody interesting! Also like Khatzumoto... ok, shoutout over ^-^.

Step 3 Challenge: LEARN KANJI!. More specifically, start with learning to properly use Surusu and get into kanji reps.

So, there it is, my first AJATT update! Remember kids, Foxx says "Jump with both feet... then you can hit the ground running!"

As far as taijitsu goes? Its flat out awesome. Its like Sun Tsu and the slaves who came up with Capoeira had a baby and that baby was Ninja. Best of all its both FUN (I climbed trees at practice- with approval) and (heres the really important part!) easier to study in Japanese. Also fits the criteria of 'living like a Japanese person.' I know they're not ALL ninjas. But I can dream.

I find myself very familiar with many of the movements and strikes, only having to make minor adjustments to what I already know- fencing steps, karate strikes, moving and rolling, parkour. I'm grateful for the corrections and experience of the group as well. It makes training more fun and your mistakes are pointed out for you! It also helps that half of the lesson- the names of the kata (heh), phrases for bowing etc. are all in Japanese. Ultimate crosstraining. Its all the sports I love- with that sweet Nihon sauce on top. *Grin*

Daily Tarot Reading: What Energy should I bring into my day? on my Llewellyn Tarot deck.

3 Card Spread- 8 of Pentacles, 10 of Pentacles, 2 of Cups.
My spreads have been *extremely* clear as of late- this one is: Diligent, dedicated hard work and a healthy respect for tradition and discipline will lead you to putting your whole heart into / falling in love with something. And its so, so true.


Thats all!
TTFN

Foxx

Welcome Friends!

Welcome, friends, to this story!

My name is Foxx P. Cant; pirate, shaman, ninja (in training) and Kitsune extraordinaire! This is a record of action and adventure, exploration and excitement, growth and change!

I invite you along on this journey: learn with me, watch me grow! I hope you, too, find the inspiration to author your own reality!

So, to begin! I am human and not human. I am what the Japanese call a kami, a nature spirit. On an energetic level I remain very much a kitsune. If you were to plug me into the Matrix, for example, I would not look human. I chose this biological form for a purpose- to be a bridge between the physical and metaphysical worlds, between the worlds of man and of nature.

How do I intend to bridge these worlds? Well, by making people laugh, dance and sing! By letting every footstep be a dance of joy, letting every word be a song of laughter, letting myself grow into a world of co-creation- planting gardens both of thought and flowers as I twirl through this divine waltz (or is it a foxtrot?!).

This current garden is for cultivating my various skills: music, movement, language, intuition. Above all, however, is the tree at the center of the garden: discipline.

As the focus for this discipline I am undertaking an immersive study of the Japanese language (thanks for the inspiration Khatzumoto!) and of bujinkan taijitsu with the goal of teaching English and training in Japan. Woven throughout this framework is the ongoing development of self through tarot reading, crystal work, music, theater, dance, movement, shamanic practice and meditative reflection.

You will find regular updates of my progress here expressed in many mediums- journal entries, poems, songs, photos, videos, along with daily tarot readings and a bunch of other surprises!

Thanks for joining me and have a great trip!

Foxx P. Cant